Wednesday, May 30, 2012


Filter through and I have a do-over day.

A chance to get it right.

A time to focus.

A warm slice of orange peaks through

And I feel the warmth spread throughout.

A gentle breeze hits me in the face and

I realize the last leg of life is speeding up.

I have to stop and realize I can still live it, enjoy it, and make a difference.

Monday, May 28, 2012




God guide my hands.

Temper my words.

Direct my steps.

Support my decisions.

Show me how to be patient.

Teach me how to be kind.

Help me find a way to be good.

Bless me with self-control.

Instill me with perseverance.

Clarify my love.

Equip me with gentleness.

Impart your peace within my every thought.

Provide me with your joy.


Sunday, May 27, 2012

pieces of one

Many but one.


Pieces of one.

Pieces of none.

Different and same.

Pieces of me.

**

I find myself alone. I find myself hopeful. I find myself lost. I find myself concerned. I find myself unsure. I find myself confused. I find myself a mix of good and bad. I find myself a collaboration between who I am and who I need to be, who I might be and who I should be, who I really try to be and who I truly am one hundred percent…and who is that?

**

The winds blow from the north and I feel a chill up my spine.

The sun beams from the south and I sense a heat in my soul.

The earth is firm below my feet and I am rock steady.

The sky is a movable transom above me and I am transported.

There is a portal to my east and I escape.

There is a threshold to my west and I stand on the edge of my exodus!

If I jump I am a coward.

If I am pushed I am a victim.

If I laugh I am a mocker.

If I cry I am a suffering fool.

Alone I stand.

Which way do I go?

Indulgent I ponder the numerous answers.

Apprehensive I make a decision.

Timidly I take the obvious way out.

I take out my journal and paints and I am carried to place free of fear and doubt.

As I splash cool blue and warm sienna on the page I am moved to a calm, carefree safe dwelling.

Words form into ideals, serene and hopeful, I reestablish my haven of well-being.

**

If it were only so simple, watching the Georgia O’Keefe movie I find myself hopeful again. Maybe I will one day have the freedom to explore my creativity as long as I need, as often as I deserve, and regardless of its end. So what if I don’t make a full living as an artist? Who cares that no one else gets me or likes my work? It heals me. It completes me. It finishes what God started within me when I was conceived. He made me who I am. I have struggled to stay that being. I have an obligation to be that entity. I exist because of His love. I breathe because His breath is in me. I must stay true or my existence means nothing! I must attempt to share my wealth of life experience and if no one bites then it is their loss.

I see the world from a vantage point no one else sees. I can share it but I cannot force the viewer or reader to accept it. I can live what I believe. I can be true to myself but I cannot make anyone else receive it. By the time I am dust in the ground my view may be valued. Maybe it will all die with me. Perhaps I am deluding myself into thinking my views are some great prize. It is possible its worth is only for my own strengthening. It is conceivable the words are meant to comfort my soul alone. It is believable the images are for my solitary benefit. If this is so then it is enough. I could not have survived otherwise.

I am who I am for a reason known only to God. He is within me and of me and I of Him. This is my life. Today I am nearly whole. I will fight to remain intact with every ounce of life inside of me. God labors in love to give life. I labor in love to maintain life. I could so easily give in and give up. I could so easily take the coward’s path. I shall struggle on. I shall writhe in pain and bear down. I shall huff and puff and be born again of His love.

(I will continue to post here as available)

Friday, May 25, 2012

FInding a way to heal

There’s an ache

Deep in my soul

I feel I will never

Again be whole

God can’t seem to get in

Let alone heal the pain

No matter how determined

My troubles remain

Locked away and hopeless

I want to run and hide

after all this time

I had a pretty good ride

But now I have to let go

And relinquish all control

I have to be able to surrender

And just bare what’s left of my soul




Wednesday, May 23, 2012

God can repair and change anyone and anything!

God patches the holes in my life with faith.

He mends the tattered edges of my soul with peace.

He repairs the broken threads in my spirit with joy.

He darns the torn holes in my heart with love.

He makes me a whole garment by His redemption.




Monday, May 21, 2012

frustrated


(still frustrated with blogging...can't do it anymore....dial up sucks...and i'm ready to quit)


Saturday, May 19, 2012

new site in progress...

getting more aggravated with the changes here that prevent those on dial up to publish....check me out at my new growing site....
http://www.christessnearart.weebly.com/

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Make the Effort

We cannot cheat life.

for in the end if we have not lived it

we have only cheated ourselves.

We cannot steal minutes and

bank them like vacation days earned on a job.

We have a finite number of them and

should never squander them on worry, fear or sadness.

We cannot change all situations.

We can change ourselves.

We can choose our attitude and reactions.

We cannot live every day on vacation but

we can take a moment of respite every day,

center our souls on Christ and His strength.

We can find peace and joy but

we must make the effort.

There are wonderful gifts waiting for us.

We must only take time to accept them.




Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Quiet Questions

Despite a gentle breeze

I feel a quiet stillness.

Despite life’s problems

I feel a quiet hope.

Despite unpleasant tasks

I feel a quiet energy.

Despite unending situations

I feel a quiet faith.

Despite earth altering fear

I feel a quiet peace.

Despite unending challenges

I feel a quiet existence.



Tuesday, May 15, 2012


Lord,


Please carry me today.

Carry them.

Give us peace and assurance.

Give us rest and healing.

Give us answers and help.

Give us direction and hope.

Give us strength and peace.

Give us your L O V E.

Amen.


Monday, May 14, 2012

first things first...
is anyone other than me having trouble moving blog to the new site?


Because of you Lord:


I find peace.

I know love.

I endure suffering.

I tolerate troubles.

I release anger.

I cling to hope.

I understand joy.

Because of you Lord.

I live a blessed life.




Thursday, May 10, 2012

the How


How I’m:

• Getting by life’s troubles.

• Getting around life’s detours.

• Getting through life’s issues

By:

• Simply observing life’s miraculous beauty.

• Graciously listening to life’s amazing sonnets.

• Appreciatively tasting life’s abundance of flavors.

• Guiltily sniffing life’s lovely fragrances.

• Warmly feeling life’s intoxicating embrace.






















Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Seeking balance between what I must do and what I desire to do.

Attempting to live without worry of what might be.

Trusting God to give blessings and hope.

Releasing control that I do not have over life.

Expecting His perfect will to guide me.

Thanking Him for all He’s done to get me this far.

Believing in His perfection, I humbly bow and accept.




Tuesday, May 08, 2012

Where to lean

Surrender all quiet.

Give up all fear.

Accept God’s love,

Always present and near.

Forget all suffering.

Ignore all trouble.

Believe and have faith

God is always able.

Release all cares.

Let go of all doubt.

God is stronger within and without.




Sunday, May 06, 2012

broken....

A broken woman

she falls apart, inside

hurting and bleeding.

On the outside she

fakes smiles and confidence.

Can anything or anyone repair her?

God is working with her.




Saturday, May 05, 2012

she...

Just a little longer,

I must trudge on.

Just a little stronger;

I must remain steady.

Just a little more faithful,

I must wait.

Just a little more careful,

I must believe.

Just a little more present,

I must remain.

Just a little more patient,

I must be.




Friday, May 04, 2012

invisible but God hears and sees me....

He hears my cries;

He will answer.

He knows my pain;

He will heal.

He understands my problems;

He will solve.

He feels my suffering;

He will rescue.

He believes my worth;

He will save.




Tuesday, May 01, 2012

He hears my cries;
He will answer.
He knows my pain;
He will heal.
He understands my problems;
He will solve.
He feels my suffering;
He will rescue.
He believes my worth;
He will save.