Monday, September 07, 2015

who needs roses?

There are days when I think I can't make it. I struggle with depression, pain, and fear. I make art to avoid therapy. It may take the rest of my life but with God's help I will not only survive but find a way to thrive. Letting go of pain and fear and doubt, I will trust God to be my companion along the darkest of paths, the longest of detours and the most difficult of situations.
I lost my dad a year and a half ago. My mom is in an Alzheimer facility. I have lots of arthritis pain, IBS, and lots of fears. I try to do what I can for all but there are days I'm too tired to do much of anything but what I must. I will be 60 this November. I cannot imagine how much time I have left but I know I've wasted much and need to start living NOW. Loving all the good in my life and letting go of the years I have abused myself with worry and fear. I am a Christian and it's time to really act like one.

My husband brought in one of the last Queen Anne's of the season and it thrilled me (who needs roses). I have to start seeing all the good in my life, the simple pleasures and count the "too many to count" blessings. I will continue to read and study and pray. I will continue to share my artistic talents. I will depend on art and journaling to get me through the last act of my life.

Thanks be to the loving God, forgiving Son and ever present Spirit of God....

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